My Star

[Barrett]

I wrote this for an EMS magazine contest...and surprisingly enough it won...thought that I would share it with all of you!

So many stars shine in the sky at night. Gazing up into the endless expanse of space we bear our souls, picking a twinkle to cast our dreams toward, hoping that one day they?ll come back around. One night I picked a star ? but my star is not just a wish, a dream, or a prayer. It stays with me all the time, and it shines all day and all night for everyone to see. It watches over us all, swooping down like a guardian angel to intervene when there?s trouble. It shone like a beacon over Oklahoma City, Columbine High School, and the World Trade Center. People all over the world recognize my star as a symbol of love and compassion, yet few truly understand what it means. For me and others like me it is a religion, a way of life. Like a child?s smile it?s glow gives us hope, renews our faith in everything that is true and good.

My star also has a dark side. I feel it over my shoulder at 3 a.m. as I race through the cold night to pull a drunk from the twisted wreckage of his vehicle while he cusses me and threatens my life. It?s unblinking, emotionless face dances mockingly over the body of each person I see die. It hangs around my neck, burning into my flesh as I tell my best friend that I have something else to do tonight ? again. I could go with him, but what if the run I miss is my father, or a helpless child who might have a chance? My star is an unspoken message to friends, family, and a long string of ex?s; it says that I love what I do and strangers whom I have known for less than an hour more than I am capable of loving them, or myself.

Yet I display my star proudly on my chest, my clothing, and my vehicle, because to so many others it sends a very different message: that no matter who you are, where you live, or what you?ve done, I will help you. I will forsake food, sleep, social activities, free time, and my own family whenever you need me. When you?re with me you are safe ? you can trust me with your darkest secrets, take your frustrations out on me, or cry on my shoulder, and I will take care of you regardless. And when you?re ready, I?ll leave and you?ll never have to see me again. You don?t owe me a thing either ? you don?t have to pay me, tell your friends about me, or even thank me. All I ask is that when you see my star, you remember what it means to me. It?s not just a logo or a symbol; it?s my heart, and my soul, for I am an EMT.